My life is in a total mess...surprise huh...im at home at tis hour blogging?Is so unlike mi...no mood to do anything tis whole fucking morning till now....Anyone wanna be kind hearted and let mi scold???Im damn frustrated...feel like going to the beach...so long i dun haf tis type of feeling le....y muz it happen to mi again now....after my grandma passed away nothing seems to go right for mi...Anyone wanna go beach???Or drink oso can.....Martell???Tink im on my way down to find u tis few days...wait 4 mi my all time favourite martell...haha Today is wednesday nite...should i go out later???Im still tinking...no mood..realli no mood...i hate my mum for alway gifing mi stress....wat do u all wan mi to do i realli dunno...tis is my life...realli my life..can u all let mi decide wat i myself wanna do....u wun b able to know the words u say realli gif mi alot alot alot of stress...do u know im in between the both of u???IF i got a chance do u tink i will wanna choose tis path..tis is FATE...u understand?Mayb god wanna play a fool on mi...Juz hope that tis can be clear ASAP??? Maybe i realli make a wrong move..i dunno...but 1 things for sure is CHI NEVER REGRET THE PATH I chose.There are so many times when i realli wanna tok to u about tis matter...but i respect u as my mum and i know whenever the both of us tok we sure quarral...I dun need all tis...i keep quite sometime is not bcoz i agree with wat u say...is that i dun wanna argue back coz i know my temper veri veri well....but PLS dun everyday oso ask mi the same things...i feel damn SICK of it....I haf Enough...REALLI ENOUGH.... Anyway...already solve tis problem 30min ago..althought the result is not wat i wan,but still we go ahead with it...i muz admit it realli hurt mi alot but i tink tis is the oni way out for u to slove tis problem am i rite?There are no other ways out le...both side gifing mi stress...i dun tink i deserve tis....seriously NO....Watever it is juz wanna let u know that thought alot of problems is coming to us i still muz realli say it out loud that I NEVER REGRET TIS PATH...ZHEN DE ~~~If oni i could.....I would.....I hope im not born into tis world full of sadness 4 mi~~~
-Is tis meaniful??? Feeling damn frustrated over something recently and my stupid hp is gifing mi alot of fucking problem lor..waiting for month end than gonna go get a new phone le...Whole day slacking in office serving net and fixing my stupid hp....making mi blood boil..and my mum kp gifing mi stress...wat the hell she wan oso i dunno lar....nothing is perfect to her lar....Search frendster and saw 1 pict on my frends blog...find it meaning and i juz copy down the pict....Pict as show below : 
Some Pict tHaT I TAKEN ON THE 10TH OF MARCH AT KTV & DBL O -My favourite pict of mi & him @ dbl O...10TH MARCH 2007 MI & Daphne @ ktv on 9th march...celebration for my last day @ work 
-My best Abang In RegENT...aLWAY SHAre my problem with him and he realli gif good advice & alway telling mi joke..IM not a rasist ya...He is realli the best in Regent alwayz...Gonna miz him......Miz u all so much in regent...now i finally realise one things....to all frends who wanna change a job to a higher pay..if u all are veri happi in the company and bcoz of higher pay u all wanna change job pls tink twice...bcoz not all company can find colledges so so close with u all and eventually u all will realise that u would rather wrk in a company u all r realli happi than wrking in a company with a higher pay...working in a good & happy environment is realli veri important.....~~~~~if i can turn back time,i will turn back till the to january 2007~~~~
Been 2 weeks since grandma left us...hmmm...still tink that she haven pass away yet..dunno y..everynite when i slp i alway can feel her presence near mi watching mi slp....ever since she pass away i haf been waking up everyday at 3.30am in the morning and i dunno y....juz feel that she is around watching us...Yest nite is the day she pass away the 7th day and they say grandma will come back visit us..i dunno y i realli miz her but at the same time i realli feel veri afraid..i heard some voice coming in from my window and i tremble....wake mummy and daddy up and i say i wanna slp at their room....If realli is grandma coming back to visit us will she be disappointed with mi??? Im Sorry "wai ma"....Nothing much recently...juz work work work and go home....that day toking to Pr in MSN...tok about granny..realise that we realli miz her alot....go to my cpu and open up the files where my sis keep my granny photo and when i saw her photo i cant help it but cry again...I tink i reali reali nv been so regret like i do now....if ever u r still here i will go visit u everyday i can....1st time in my life i can realli feel the pain in my heart of lossing someone who is so close to mi...Memory of her changing into the "SHOU YI" when she passed away realli make mi drop tears...I cant help but miz her...i regret for not visiting her on sunday...can anyone feel how regret im realli feeling...the veri last day i saw grandma was at CNY when we go to shi shi house for house warming and all of them was gambling and mike and mi send grandma and her maid home to LR house 1st coz Oni LR is at home....I still remember she is so talkative in the car toking to mike telling him to bring her out to play since he got car...When we reach LR house she still kp asking LR to change shirt coz we wanna go out to play & we nv bother about her coz that time is ard 12+ midnite and we thought that she anyhow tok again and behave like kids...if ever i know tis day come so fast i will bring u out on that day regardless how late it is wai ma...do i still haf tis chance???Never will i haf tis chance anymore....There are things i realli regret for not doing...Im sori for not cherishing u when u r alive..thought sometimes i might tok to u in a veri rude voice but im sure u know inside my heart i realli realli love and respect u since im young....Tired if working le..feel like taking a long break b4 i start work again..i know i cant do it now unless i realli make up my mind to resign....working half way on sat and i receive a msg saying wanna go fly kite later & haf a picnic??? Of coz i readily agree to it coz i nv go fly kite b4 lar..and my kite realli fly veri high up to the sky lor coz we used up 2 rolls of needle string.....Below are some photo of my kites flying session...haha
-My Kite......
-ReaDY tO FLY-Sporty hor?Haha
-My kite going to fly soon...c his face so serious... (dunno got skills anot)And Up my kite fly slowly up into the sky..and is too high up and i cant take pict of it at my lousy hp...haha.....And after that go home to rest and at nite when PR house to eat MEE hoon kuay but end up the mee hoon kuay is wasted u all know y?Bcoz she mistaken the leave the father used to bath as cai sim lor and end up the whole bowl of mee hoon kuay bcum bitter....do u call c such a big pig b4???Haha...thats wat her mum say lar...Watch dvd at her house...Blood diamond?Ya..i tink so..quite a nice movie thought i seldom watch english show but the movie was good....can go buy the DVD and watch it..Went home ard 2.30pm and off i went to bed till sunday!!! ~~~ Can u feel that how much i realli realli miz u~~~
IT haf been sometimes since i last write my blog....I haf got no mood to write my blog the last weeks....coz something veri bad happen to us....My BELOVED GRANDMA passed away..is so unbelivable..she left us on 12/03/2007 at 4.50pm.....I cant believe it nor i juz cant accept it when my sis call and tell mi that she is gone...The conversation between mi and mi sis
sis : mei...grandma die le
me: huh??
sis:grandma die already
me:u dun tok cock with mi lar
sis:tok cock for wat..
than she continue to cry and i know it is the truth...few min later after sis hang up ah na (the maid who look after my grandma) she call mi and say "ah mei...ah mai mei you le"....i sit on my desk stone for afew min and tears started to row down to my cheek......Start to pack my bag & leave the office at 4.50pm....waited so long for the freaking cab and as i was about to on call the cab a transcab appear....i got no enff cash with mi lor..i juz board the cab without tinking and when reaching sembawang i ask the maid to take $$$ from my mum and pass to mi...all the way from jurong to semabawang i was crying in the cab coz i REGRET...realli realli REGRET not visiting my grandma on sunday with LR & My sis....Actually plan to go visit her on monday after work..but everything is TOO LATE....I nv visit her on sunday bcoz sat after sharon wedding i went dbl O to mit LR they all...and sunday when i wake up it is already 4++..i was so tired..when sis ask mi wanna go visit grandma i say i visit her tml...6pm LR call mi...telling mi grandma look sick and nv eat for a few days..i still tell her i visit her tml coz im preparing to go ah cai wedding....ALL MY FAULT..MY FAULT FOR NOT VISITNG HER & WENT FOR THE WEDDING DINNER....tats y i lost my grandma without seeing her for the last time.. Since young im already veri close to my grandma..thats y im so attached to her..my mum alway tell mi last time when she playing majong at PR house i will lye beside my grandma leg instead of playing with LR they all....She is the most lovable grandma i ever saw...she always ask mi to cut her hair and dig her ear for her...she is veri vain lor...if omeone mess her hair she will beat the person and scold them CB...she love martell & guinestout.....Ever since last year she already act like a kid le...sometime tok like children...so cute...She dote on the 5 of us the most though she alway scold us...now no grandma to scold us le...no grandma to irritate us...no grandma to make us laugh le..no grandma to scold us cb..no grandma to ask us to eat dinner..no grandma to love us...no more le....we got no mre GRANDMA...GOD..U R TOO CRUEL TO TAKE MY GRANDMA AWAY WHEN SHE HAVEN C ALL OF US..DO U KNOW I STILL GOT SO MUCH TO TOK TO HER??? Till todae i still cannot forget the day when i c her at my uncle house when she pass away...Her whole body was so soft when i touch her....i cant accept the fact that she haf die when i reach sbw untill the doc come and verify that grandma death is a natural death....Was crying the whole nite after i left sbw coz i tink of the days when she was still with us...i regret not making the effort to visit her in sbw when she is still ard...im sorry ma...Serioulsy i nv felt the pain of losing someone so so so close to mi till the day when she pass away...I love my grandma and i wanna let her know if ever there is another chance i still hope that u will be my grandma in the next life coz u r the ever best grandma i ever haf and love the most......Im missing u!!! ~~~Thought u are gone...u will alway haf a special place in my heart..i love u grandma~~~
Hmm...so fast tobolo sharon getting married le...shall take loads of pict k..1st time im attending my close frend wedding lar....Veri happi for her but she too young le lar...20year old oni lar...how can u get married b4 mi...hahahaha.....Anyway hopefully she is blissfully married ever lasting... Been a week since i last update rite...been busy trying to settle down and get use of my new job environment lar....the 1st few days i realli cant get use to it and i feel like gifing up..but things get better after my auntie come back from her trip....Now im slowly picking up to adjust everything le...No boss here...boss in indonesia..so my office oni got my aunt..me and a sales manager...the rest of the nerdy gals all at another office across the building..luckily im not in the same office as u all lor or i will be bored to death..hahaha....Start to like tis job le coz no boss here..i got 100% freedom...can go out for breakfast at anytime they wan lor...so good... 05/03/2007 (Monday)Reach work at 8.50am with my sales manager..got a meeting at 10am todae..1st time i reali seat in a meeting with supplier..my sales manager and my auntie...Veri excited lar..but at the same time i dunno wat to write on my blank sheet of paper lor...haha..i oni k siao write a few lines of rubbish..after the meeting i come out i throw away the paper lor..a good experience for me lar...haha...after meeting ard 11.40am my aunt toking cock with those supplier untill 12pm..than we proceed to go jurong point for lunch with the 2 suppliers..we went crystal jade...eat alot lar..so full..ard 1.30pm the supplier got to rush to meet another customer so he wanted to gif us a lift back to office but my auntie say dun need coz we wana go shopping...haha..so we go shop ard and buy alot of maggi mee..tibits and stuff to store in office lor..take a taxi back to office and reach back ard 3.30pm..pack those stuff and 1hr later off wrk...haha.Hmm..my aunt say mayb next month gonna go surabaya for training le..so fast..can i dun go???There so damgerous lar..i scare.haha.My auntie realli a good boss lor...she worried sometime they go out meet customer and i alone in office and nv go lunch so she store alot of food in out pantry lor.... Hmm..nothing much the last few days lar...Go home after work..coz so tired lar....except that yest mike come fetch mi at 5+ and went tampinese mall to find PR lor....bring Pr to c My X company pegeout car..haha..coz mike wanna go office and punch out his card....Went to eat pizza with mike while waiting for PR...haha....eat alot lar...jiat lat lar..i already nv shit for 3 days lar...my stomache look so bloated or am i getting fatter..haha..ya lar..i tink so im getting fatter lar...eat and eat non-stop...thats y now he alway call mi "ah pui"...haha Todae after work meeting my x colledgues they all to ktv lor....Actually at nite gonna go shin bar coz weiwen bdae..but due to some problem mayb i wun be going le...Im not obligated to go to ur bdae k..dun haf to say nasty things ya....is does not bother us at all u get it? So long nv go dbl O le..finally im going tml lor...haha..im so happi...shall update photo soooon ya.. Programme for fri..sat & sunday: 09/03/2007- KTV follow by shin bar---->maybe oni10/03/2007-Sharon wedding follow bY DBL O11/03/2007-Ah cai wedding follow by HOme Sweet Home... My pocket got 1 hole lor....too much thing in a week le....haha...anyway im gonna enjoy myself to the fullest tis 3 days..... ~~~~~原来爱情这么伤,比想像中还难~~~~~
I wish this day never come so fast !!! Times reall flies past so fast...todae is the 4th of march le....send Ch to airport tis morning,still telling them that i will not cry lor...haha...but who knows i realli cannot tahan le..i haf been controlling myself not to drop tears lar..but when she gif mi a hug b4 she go in i realli cant help and my tears start to roll down...realli gonna miz her,she is like a real elder sister to me...whenever i encounter any problems with my family she is always there to tok to mi and help mi to solve the problems...i can say she realli do alot of things 4 us....Life is gonna to be different for the both families of us without u i tink....Alot of us will miz u k...include my families..ur frends...Ur families and relative of us....hmmm...stupid LR make mi cry lor...she kp crying lar...seeing her like that so sad lar....so many of them cry todae even my 6th auntie and my mummy..i tink u can feel how much we dun bear to let u go bah....but for ur future,we still wish u all the best k....The 5 of us will alway be together and nothings gonna separate us...do u know how many ppls envy us of our close cousins bonding...Thought u r far away from the 4 of us but our heart will alway stay close k....surely will miz u alotz...
Hmm..alot of ppl go send her off todae..i tink around 27 ppls..include her frends too....the crying babies are (from the worst cry baby rated top on the list ) : -Lirong-Perlyn-Cherish-Keline-6TH auntie-My mum-Peirong-ME-pq
haha...the rest who i nv mention their name is those oni got tears in their eyes oni lar..kiaoz..LR...keline...perlyn and cherish the most jiat lat lar...they at burger king already drop tears le lor....ya..i muz admit it is veri sad..hmm....tink my 6th uncle is the most sad but he act act strong oni lar....anyway hope u all will get use to life without Ch bah.....
The 5 of us when we are young -start from left:pq..lr...ch..pr & me
The 5 BEst cousins-grown up together since young..OK...shall stop here...Ch ....we gonna miz u to the max coz the 5 of us nv separate b4 since we are young...Loving u alwayz ya..hope u will do well in australia...shall save $$$ from todae onwards & go visit u.....
k...shall update on my new job now..b4 i start let mi post some post dated favourite photo ba
My last day at regent-28/02/2007...My desk-gonna miz it....
Me & my best cousins-nv fail to share problem with her........
Nothing much to update..started work on 01/03/2007..whole day doing nothing..feel so sian...miz all my ex colledges...early in the morning the 1st day all of them msg mi and ask mi i wake up already anot..im so touch...haha..not use to tis new job..i tink i realli need alot of time to adapt to tis new working environment..mike off work early todae to come and fetcg mi at 5pm coz he say todae my 1st day so he come fetch mi and support support..haha..after that he bring mi go dinner than ard 10++pm we go home le...
02/03/2007 (friday)Wats new?As usual after wrk i come home and bath than at nite go shin bar with weiwen..Dap & PR...Never drink much that day coz i got work the next day...hmm..but it was fun that nite coz we are playing card game and the 4 of us go but end up our table got 8 ppls lor...haha...went home ard 2.30am than headed to bed straight...Some pict taken at shin bar..... 
-Shin bar...bestest cosuins~~~wenshan..me & peirong~~~ 
Can u c all the drunk face & watery eyes...haha---taken tis pict after pr go toilet vomit---
~~~xinfu mah...drunk le oso got kiss~~~normally im the one kissing ppl lar..he wanna snatch my title..
C my BEAR on my hand...mike pay $$$ but the bear is chose by peirong...i tink her taste got serious problem lar....haha
Group pict @ shin bar-from left to right PR...Daphne..me..PQ & Wenshan...
ok lar...Finish blogging le...i wanna go take a nap le...shall update again when i free k...got to settle down in my new work place 1st than can use cpu to update blog there.... ~~~~~~Gonna miz u alotz,bestest cousins forever~~~~~
...The GAL ~~
>>Felicia Song/Fenfen/Ah mei
>>Born in 06/09/1984
>>22 year old/female
>>Love Family althought alway quarral
>>Love Cousins..
>>Love friends
>>Love the guy who will truly love me
>>Love ktv..Clubbing...beach
[[*My Adores*]]
...WISHES~~
>>Be Happy alwayz
>>Have more $$$ to Spend & Go Travel
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...Hates~~
>>Naggy people...
>>BetRAYers
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